Why We Refuse to Get Married
- Entering into marriage would mean effectively signing a contract where:
- we don't get to read all the applicable rules before signing (much less set them ourselves)
- the applicable rules change from state to state
- the applicable rules can be changed over time, without our consent
- Until marriage is available to everyone, it discriminates unfairly against anyone who doesn't fit the standard model.
- It is too restrictive and doesn't allow for the kind of family we ultimately want to build.
- Both of us have tried marriage (Harena twice, Woozle once), and found it an entirely unsatisfactory tool for strengthening a relationship. It tended to push our relationships with our spouses – and our lives – in directions in which we did not want to go, weakening desirable elements of the relationship and initially hiding flaws which only became apparent later on.
We are not the only "couple" boycotting marriage; see issuepedia:marriage boycott.
- 2015-11-18 [
- 2012-06-25 Cindy Brown makes some similar and related points